I’m choosing to think of my post-baby body like this:

Imagine a leather shoe. Then, imagine putting a shoe-stretcher into said shoe. And every day you crank that shoe stretcher wider and wider. You do this for close to ten months.  

One day, the shoe-stretcher falls out of the shoe. Hooray! But you look at the shoe, all loose and stretched out like, “Huh?” You wonder: “Why do you look like this?” And then you get mad at the shoe for not being exactly like it was before you decided to stretch it out for close to a year. 

You can’t get mad at the shoe, ladies. Do not get mad at the shoe! As what you are asking of the shoe is physically impossible.

It will take some time for it to get back to it’s normal shape, if it ever does. Be patient. Be kind. Try to love this new shoe. But always remember why it looks the way it does. It helps.

(This diary entry brought you by Dorothy, the master of the metaphors.)