Diary, August 28: Chin hair edition

I’m sitting here, trying to think what to write, and tugging on this one lone chin hair I get. It’s a weird, yet familiar thing, this chin hair. I will forget it’s there, and then one day I will feel it (it’s always about a half an inch by the time I notice it), and then I’ll spend some time trying to pull it with my fingernails. It’s a satisfying way to spend some time. 

A long, long time ago (I must have been a teenager), I remember watching Rosie O’Donnell’s talk show. Do you remember that? She loved Tom Cruise and that’s all she ever talked about.

Well, one day, she talked about HER lone chin hair. She told the studio audience about it and told them it was really long.

“How long could it be?,” we all wondered.

And then she showed us. She had taped it up to her neck and bejeweled the bottom of it with a little gem stone. She released the tape and it quickly swung in the air and bounced a little bit, like a body falling through the gallows. The camera zoomed in, and we all saw it dangling there.

The crowd … didn’t know what to do. I think there was awkward laughter. I think she continued to talk about it for the entire 30 minutes (or was it an hour? Did they really give Rosie O’Donnell an hour-long talk show?).


I feel like this could be a terrible dream of mine if I didn’t just do a Google search one day and find this. At least someone else witnessed this horror?


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